Disorganized Crime: Incompetent Crooks and the New Economy
by Graham Silnicki
Toronto Life - 04/09
Criminally speaking, 2009 got off to a less-than-savoury start, with a surge of small-time crookery and a slew of bungling bandits who make Ernie and Bert look like Bonnie and Clyde. Could be the bum job market is spurring former law abiders into action, or maybe even career criminals learn to live with less during a recession. Here, a month of misconduct:
Jan. 7, 2009Three armed and masked men (one bearing a sawed-off, duct-taped shotgun) storm the Yorkville jewelry giant Cartier in broad daylight and escape with a collection of lower-end trinkets. Cops call the crime "unsophsticated" but fail to nab the perps.
Jan. 13, 2009A lone gunman tries to bag free bling at Luxe Jewellery in the Malvern Town Centre but instead gets chased out by the store's bat-wielding owner.
Jan. 17, 2009Two armed men hold up a south Rosedale Swiss Chalet, blindfold three employees and bind the manager's hands with a phone cord. The take: $200 (enough for 19 quarter-chicken dinners).
Jan. 23, 2009Four masked men handcuff four employees at Hero Army Surplus in Oshawa and make off with a small militia's worth of knives, replica handguns and paintball supplies.
Jan. 24, 2009Two gunmen are forced to flee when police break up an attempted Beer Store heist at Dupont and Lansdowne. Both are caught after one suspect fires his shotgun, grazing a cop's head.
Jan. 24, 2009Three delivery guys are knocked over in separate incidents on a single night: a KFC driver is held at gunpoint, a Pizza Pizza driver is confronted by a shotgun-toting thief, and a Sushi Delight driver is punched in the stomach before two suspects make off with the free fish.
Jan. 30, 2009Three knife-bearing teens hit a Brampton McDonald's after closing, forcing five employees into a walk-in fridge. The minimal cash grab was probably not worth getting arrested for two days later.
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