100 Things Restaurant Staff Should Never Do (Part 1) Herewith is a modest list of dos and don’ts for servers at the seafood restaurant I am building. Veteran waiters, moonlighting actresses, libertarians and baristas will no doubt protest some or most of what follows. They will claim it homogenizes them or stifles their true nature. And yet, if 100 different actors play Hamlet, hitting all the same marks, reciting all the same lines, cannot each one bring something unique to that role?
1. Do not let anyone enter the restaurant without a warm greeting.
2. Do not make a singleton feel bad. Do not say, “Are you waiting for someone?” Ask for a reservation. Ask if he or she would like to sit at the bar.
3. Never refuse to seat three guests because a fourth has not yet arrived.
4. If a table is not ready within a reasonable length of time, offer a free drink and/or amuse-bouche. The guests may be tired and hungry and thirsty, and they did everything right.
5. Tables should be level without anyone asking. Fix it before guests are seated.
6. Do not lead the witness with, “Bottled water or just tap?” Both are fine. Remain neutral.
7. Do not announce your name. No jokes, no flirting, no cuteness.
8. Do not interrupt a conversation. For any reason. Especially not to recite specials. Wait for the right moment.
9. Do not recite the specials too fast or robotically or dramatically. It is not a soliloquy. This is not an audition.
10. Do not inject your personal favorites when explaining the specials.
11. Do not hustle the lobsters. That is, do not say, “We only have two lobsters left.” Even if there are only two lobsters left.
12. Do not touch the rim of a water glass. Or any other glass.
13. Handle wine glasses by their stems and silverware by the handles.
14. When you ask, “How’s everything?” or “How was the meal?” listen to the answer and fix whatever is not right.
15. Never say “I don’t know” to any question without following with, “I’ll find out.”
16. If someone requests more sauce or gravy or cheese, bring a side dish of same. No pouring. Let them help themselves.
17. Do not take an empty plate from one guest while others are still eating the same course. Wait, wait, wait.
18. Know before approaching a table who has ordered what. Do not ask, “Who’s having the shrimp?”
19. Offer guests butter and/or olive oil with their bread.
20. Never refuse to substitute one vegetable for another.
21. Never serve anything that looks creepy or runny or wrong.
22. If someone is unsure about a wine choice, help him. That might mean sending someone else to the table or offering a taste or two.
23. If someone likes a wine, steam the label off the bottle and give it to the guest with the bill. It has the year, the vintner, the importer, etc.
24. Never use the same glass for a second drink.
25. Make sure the glasses are clean. Inspect them before placing them on the table.
26. Never assume people want their white wine in an ice bucket. Inquire.
27. For red wine, ask if the guests want to pour their own or prefer the waiter to pour.
28. Do not put your hands all over the spout of a wine bottle while removing the cork.
29. Do not pop a champagne cork. Remove it quietly, gracefully. The less noise the better.
30. Never let the wine bottle touch the glass into which you are pouring. No one wants to drink the dust or dirt from the bottle.
31. Never remove a plate full of food without asking what went wrong. Obviously, something went wrong.
32. Never touch a customer. No excuses. Do not do it. Do not brush them, move them, wipe them or dust them.
33. Do not bang into chairs or tables when passing by.
34. Do not have a personal conversation with another server within earshot of customers.
35. Do not eat or drink in plain view of guests.
36. Never reek from perfume or cigarettes. People want to smell the food and beverage.
37. Do not drink alcohol on the job, even if invited by the guests. “Not when I’m on duty” will suffice.
38.Do not call a guy a “dude.”
39. Do not call a woman “lady.”
40. Never say, “Good choice,” implying that other choices are bad.
41. Saying, “No problem” is a problem. It has a tone of insincerity or sarcasm. “My pleasure” or “You’re welcome” will do.
42. Do not compliment a guest’s attire or hairdo or makeup. You are insulting someone else.
43. Never mention what your favorite dessert is. It’s irrelevant.
44. Do not discuss your own eating habits, be you vegan or lactose intolerant or diabetic.
45. Do not curse, no matter how young or hip the guests.
46. Never acknowledge any one guest over and above any other. All guests are equal.
47. Do not gossip about co-workers or guests within earshot of guests.
48. Do not ask what someone is eating or drinking when they ask for more; remember or consult the order.
49. Never mention the tip, unless asked.
50. Do not turn on the charm when it’s tip time. Be consistent throughout.
Next week: 51-100.
COMMENTS I don’t know–I was a bartender here in NYC from 1978 to 1993, and I wouldn’t protest a single one of these. They are all perfectly logical and appropriate to me, and I would have been happy to work at, and be happy to be a patron at, any establishment that followed these rules.
This should be a must for every server and restaurant employee to memorize. I agree with all 50 and look forward to the next 50. The best one is when a waiter tells you which is their favorite. Do I care? No!
This makes me a bit nostalgic for the days I waited and bused tables. Incidentally, Bruce, you seem like the kind of diner whose food would get spit in. I’m not your slave and if I want to complement somebody I will, and when I’ve got 8 other tables I’ll take your order when you’re ready, I don’t see why I have to stand around waiting for a lull in your conversation.
I don’t EVER want to hear a waitperson say “Still working on that?” when eyeing my not-empty plate! Food is for pleasure, not for work.
Circulate this widely please.
What about a list of things diners should never do? As a former server, I can give you one-hundred of those and then some. Servers are generally far better behaved than some of the customers we have to deal with. Period.
These are actually good rules for the guests too–never touch the server, never curse, never ask for the server’s favorites, etc. It is easy to forget that a compliment to one person, when in a group, often means others feel left out. No one means to snub, but they happen. If we all thought about the over all experience our interactions create, we would be much better off.
This will probably be covered in the next installment but please, never, never ask, “Do you want change?” Don’t try to shame me into giving you a tip larger than I intended - just bring the change.
How arrogant! The author should describe what staffers should DO, and WHY; not what they should NOT do. That simply shows that the author is a terrible manager and has chosen employees poorly in the past. Anyone who applauds this article should be forced to wait on people to get a glimpse of reality.
I don’t like it when a restaurant removes each plate as soon as the person finishes eating, finally leaving one lone member of the party finishing up. This seems to be standard operating procedure now, though.
Okay, just two more and we’re in dining heaven: 1. Do not ask, “How is everything!” when a diner has his or her mouth full. 2. Do not ever comment on the conversation at a table. Once a waitress came over and said, “Sounds like a great movie!” when a friend was telling me a serious story from his life.
Oh boy, thanks for mentioning #17! It drives me crazy when the busboy starts removing plates while somebody is still eating. As a former restaurant owner, this is the first thing I taught my employees. How stupid does one feel when they’re still eating and everybody else has had their plates removed? Some people eat faster than others, or somebody is talking more and eating less quickly, I hesitate to mention this to the bus person, as they’re just doing as they’ve been told, and I don’t want to cause trouble for them, but I do occasionally say something to the manager and of course they ‘yes’ me but I know they just don’t get it.
Hallelujah! I want to send this to the last place that we had an atrociously bad waitress. I was reamed on Yelp for giving a bad review for the service, but they deserved it after violating MANY MANY of the above….I stand by my review. Waitstaff should know better, particularly in a fancy place.
As a consumer, I appreciate this list. I also hope that the restaurant owner and manager offer their employees the same level of treatment–measured in respect, salary, and benefits–that they expect from them.
Here’s some tips from the Brotherhood of Servers & Busers to a restaurant wage:
1) Offer your serving staff health insurance;
2) Offer your serving staff paid vacation, sick leave, and personal days;
3) Pay overtime out-of-pocket and do not expect tips to properly compensate for long hours — servers often work “doubles” over 10+ hours in a day. They should be compensated accordingly at a minimum of $15 per hour for hours logged over 8 in a day;
If you abide by these 3 basic, just and fair tenets — you can fully expect an exceptional level of professionalism from your servers. If you’re greed gets the best of you, be happy with whatever you get & keep your 100 tips in good use by reciting them to yourself each night as you struggle to fall asleep.
— Retired Waiter
I agree with all of them except #7. Nothing turns a server’s head faster than “Justin.” if their name is Justin. Knowing that allows a guest to get their server’s attention without flailing about. It also allows me to tell management about a fine or not so fine job.
I was looking for my pet peeve, the server who auctions off the food at the table because it is apparently too complicated to remember who ordered what. I found it, # 18. Hard to imagine 51 - 100. This list seems to cover it all. What is the name of the seafood restaurant the writer is opening? I WILL be a customer!
On point #14, my family and I went out to dinner and at one point I quietly remarked that some times it seems as if waiters automatically ask “is everything okay?” without really caring about the answer. As if on cue, a waiter came by and asked the question. My father-in-law, who was having a bad time with some overcooked, tough steak, answered “no” and explained the problem, to which the waiter answered “good, good” and walked away.
Regarding #18: My favorite is when the server comes to the table and says, “Are you the trout?”
I used to be a waitress myself. How hard is it to remember what people ordered? That’s the waiter’s job. And don’t hand me the plate for goodness sake. Put it down in front of me.
A pet peeve of mine is any restaurant personnel who says “Oh I’m sorry, so and so was supposed to do that” I don’t care. Apologize for the problem, and fix it. Don’t tell me who you blame. You can argue about who does what after I leave. And you will get a bigger tip for fixing the problem than trying to make it look like you don’t make mistakes.
When waitstaff ask too many times, “Is everything all right?”, I eventually reply, “Just what’s bad that I should I be looking for?”
[Comment total: 1,158]
Part 2 __________________________________________________
How to Be a Better Restaurant Customer (blog) Restaurant customers do some rude, insensitive, and downright stupid things! Not only do these behavioural issues frustrate servers, they interfere with the quality of service that you, the customer receive. STOP SABOTAGING YOUR OWN DINING EXPERIENCE!
Men Hunt in Packs But the Waitress is NOT the Prey For a female server getting hit on regularly is part of the job. Especially when waiting on a large group of guys. They tend to egg each other on. I get all of the classics. "Did you get a traffic ticket today? Cuz you got FINE written all over you!" or "Is your mother a terrorist? Because you are the bomb!" I'm multi-racial, and some guys tell me I look like Mariah Carey and I've had a few think it was cute to say "oh, we didn't know Alicia Keys would be waiting on us today!".
That's just great, but I'm married to a gorgeous guy and even if I wasn't, I'm at work to get money, not compliments or dates. I endure stupid pick-up lines politely because I assume extravagant talk will be accompanied by extravagant tips. Sometimes there are astronomic sums involved, such as $100 on a $200 tab, $50 on a $40 tab, or a guy that told me I could name my tip, whatever I wanted. Other times you'll get four guys, bill well over $100, all think they're the Don Juan of the new millenium, and they each leave you a buck. What?!? And y'all told me I was the most beautiful waitress you'd ever seen! What do you leave the ugly waitress, 40 cents?
To all the men out there, for future reference, you're not doing the waitress a favor by hitting on her, nor are you making her day. You're probably getting on her last nerves! You want to show the buxom waitress your appreciation for her awesome assets? Show her the money!! ________________________________________________
RELATED A Dozen Food Trends We're Tired of High-end burgers, high-end pizza, high-end Bánh Mì — can't we just put a thousand-year ban on this crap already? ________________________________________________
RELATED How Men Eat A personal catalog of likes, dislikes, habits, and rules. By men. _________________________________________________
SMALL TOWN ONTARIO In August, my friend CC and I took a drive to Port Perry. It was a hot, sunny, beautiful summer day and as we left Toronto, I was struck by what lies just outside the city's limits. Between the sprawling fields, decaying barns and wafting, pungent aromas of manure, I felt like I'd stepped into a time machine...
Burd's Fishing When CC told me we were going fishing, I thought he was joking
It's a trout pond, but all I see is a teeming cesspool of fish lice
Hey fishies, the Atlantic is thataway -->
Ha! Caught one! I nicknamed my easy prey Ziggy after the fella in the pic
I told CC there was no way in hell I was gonna eat that thing. After spending several hours in the car in a bag of ice, it was lovingly prepared and hungrily devoured by his cleaning lady. No word as to any subsequent "side effects".
Hulshof Farms Stunningly pretty view
Just like a painting, really
This is as close as I'll ever get to "roughin' it"
My urbanite sensibility sees this and thinks, how rustic, quaint, country blah,blah, blah...omg - it's just a freakin' sign
Where art thou, Romeo?
A true picture window
Field fresh beans are ten times sweeter than the waxy grocery store variety
Cute farmer boy holding his *ahem* zucchini
Enough broccoli to feed a small nation
There's no way that giant ass broccoli is fitting in my fridge, CC
Roadside cafe An adorable place for a pit stop
It sold the usual condiments, baked goods and frozen prepared dinners
CC and I shared a slice of gluten free cake that was so stale you could use it to commit assault and battery
What's that, CC? Only 99 miles left to go??
Port Perry An idyllic waterfront view__pics by CC
Had grilled fish and salad here; the waitress was a sweetie
I wonder if he caught anything...
The local barber's vacation notice
MISC. Beautiful polished wood totem pole at 777 Bay St.
This spa treatment gift certificate will finally get my ass in the door of The Hazelton Hotel
Dinner with Mr. Movie__Sado Sushi
I sampled raw fish for the first time and devoured at least six of these shrimp sushi
My building's fire alarm system is connected to both the underlying gym and mall's systems, and is also extremely sensitive - if dust flies up into it, it goes off. As a consequence, there're many false alarms, of which this was one.
I counted at least four trucks arriving on the scene, all for naught.
My building's concierge talking to a very cute fireman
When it comes to packaging their product, Vitamin Water gets it right__Bloor St. W.
With this brightly-coloured binder, there's no excuse to forget your homework__Shoppers Drug Mart__Yonge St.
I can see myself in this dress, though I've no clue what's going on at the waistline__Le Chateau__Yonge St.
HUDSON BAY CENTRE I blame Kanye for this trend__Ardene
Visually-arresting M.A.C. poster
Rafters reflects the black-and-white trend with this lovely rug
This suit has St. Tropez written all over it__The Bay
Indigo Books I was passing through the bookstore when lo and behold, there was A.J. Jacobs, who in his black thick-rimmed glasses, looked and sounded like a younger Jerry Lewis
Is it by coincidence or design that the extensive magazine rack is located next to an in-store mini Starbucks? I spent a lazy Sunday afternoon sipping tea and (carefully) flipping pages... Mr. Cheekbones himself, Christian Bale
Sigh...Eric Bana
Vs. has convinced me that when it comes to fashion magazines, it's better to "go big or go home". Their publication has the size and heft of a coffee table book and is just as worthy of being a collector's item. Unfortunately, at $20 a pop, I'll have to content myself with mere browsing.
WANT: Cesare Paciotti sequined sandals__Elle UK
Fetishistic Alexander McQueen thigh high boots on Rachel Weisz__Elle UK
Peter Morentzos – Restaurant Master of Montreal EXCERPTS Morentzos never forgets that he came from humble beginnings; now, he gives back to the community that has been good to him. He contributes to countless charitable causes, ranging from women’s shelters to leukemia. Every Christmas, he opens his restaurants to the homeless, who are treated as if they were elite clientele. Morentzos recalls one year when a family of four arrived, speaking little English. They had come to Canada for a better life but hadn’t had any luck. “At the end of the meal, they tried to tip the waiter with quarters and dimes,” Morentzos says. “I saw it, and that was the end. I went to the bathroom for at least 15 minutes by myself.”
He admits that he is strict with his employees. “I’ve always wanted to be a dictator of a small country,” he jokes.
We chat about personal style. “A person’s watch can tell many things,” he says. “A man’s tie can say it all.” In his life, Morentzos has seen numerous people come and go and can spot a phony from a mile away. “When you enter a restaurant, you ooze something that you want people to see,” he says. “I see people trying so hard to be something they’re not. It works for some people, but it doesn’t work for most.”
Since he said a watch reveals so much, we can’t help but notice that he wears his on his right wrist. We ask why he doesn’t wear it on the left. His answer is simple: “Because everybody else does.”
MRG: Morentzos Restaurant Group It is impossible to mention Montreal's vibrant restaurant scene without mentioning Peter Morentzos. Now 47 years old, his humble beginnings started as a pizza delivery boy and selling men’s clothing...Details are everything to Peter and his interpretation of such sensory elements have inspired him to develop well over 13 unique restaurant concepts and build over 65 restaurants in 20 years.
Anthropologie doesn't sell merchandise—it sells a lifestyle. Founder Richard Hayne took lessons learned from his successful creation of Urban Outfitters, which sells hip clothing and accessories for twentysomethings, and transformed them into a concept where the focus is not on the fashion of the moment, but on merchandise that soothes women's souls while getting them to open their pocketbooks.
Anthropologie stores are a carefully orchestrated attack on the senses, from the French music to the aromatic candles burning to the rough-hewn signs throughout. Each retailing quadrant acts as its own island, displaying a theme and flavor all its own. Customers enter "The Washroom" and find exotic soaps, lotions, dispensers and even a medicine cabinet for sale. They step into "The Boudoir" and discover sumptuous sheets, duvet covers and pillows luxuriously displayed on a wrought-iron bed (also available for purchase). In fact, selling the props makes the stores seem as if the customer has uncovered a rare artifact—a piece that she alone can own.
The store flies in the face of traditional retailing: It focuses not on one category of goods, but on disparate merchandise that's centered around a theme. Books, clothing, jewelry and patio furniture can be found there. As market expert Jon Schallert of The Schallert Group, a management and marketing consulting firm in Sorrento, Florida, explains, "a 'controlled clutter' design works because it keeps the customer interested." He advises his own clients to display merchandise in an uncoventional way so the customer discovers the merchandise as if on a special treasure hunt. Anthropologie has mastered this strategy.
To foster originality in each of its 50 stores, Anthropologie hires two artists for every location to create art unique to that store. This helps bolster the image of Anthropologie as an independent, free-spirited retailer, not a cookie-cutter franchise.
Anthropologie's buyers are on a mission to scour the globe for interesting, relevant and unusual items for its core customer. They see her as a professional woman aged 30 to 45, well-read, well-traveled and well-educated, with a household income approaching $200,000.
And she is a devout fan. Customers spend an average of $80 per visit, leading to average sales per square foot of approximately $600—not bad for a store that is all about creating a mood. ----------------------------------------------------- Hazelton Avenue Stunning colour at the Bra Bar Boutique
Newly opened Ace Lifestyle tempts me into learning golf with these cute shoes__Hazelton Lanes
81 Yorkville Ave.
100 Things Restaurant Staff Should Never Do (Part 1)
Liz, Best Waitress Ever
A Dozen Food Trends We're Tired of
How Men Eat
When CC told me we were going fishing, I thought he was joking
It's a trout pond, but all I see is a teeming cesspool of fish lice.jpg)
Hey fishies, the Atlantic is thataway -->
Ha! Caught one! I nicknamed my easy prey Ziggy after the fella in the pic
I told CC there was no way in hell I was gonna eat that thing. After spending several hours in the car in a bag of ice, it was lovingly prepared and hungrily devoured by his cleaning lady. No word as to any subsequent "side effects".
Stunningly pretty view
Just like a painting, really
This is as close as I'll ever get to "roughin' it"
My urbanite sensibility sees this and thinks, how rustic, quaint, country blah,blah, blah...omg - it's just a freakin' sign
Where art thou, Romeo?
A true picture window
Field fresh beans are ten times sweeter than the waxy grocery store variety
Cute farmer boy holding his *ahem* zucchini
Enough broccoli to feed a small nation
There's no way that giant ass broccoli is fitting in my fridge, CC
An adorable place for a pit stop
It sold the usual condiments, baked goods and frozen prepared dinners.jpg)
CC and I shared a slice of gluten free cake that was so stale you could use it to commit assault and battery
What's that, CC? Only 99 miles left to go??
An idyllic waterfront view__pics by CC
Had grilled fish and salad here; the waitress was a sweetie
I wonder if he caught anything...
The local barber's vacation notice
Beautiful polished wood totem pole at 777 Bay St.
This spa treatment gift certificate will finally get my ass in the door of The Hazelton Hotel
Dinner with Mr. Movie__Sado Sushi
I sampled raw fish for the first time and devoured at least six of these shrimp sushi
My building's fire alarm system is connected to both the underlying gym and mall's systems, and is also extremely sensitive - if dust flies up into it, it goes off. As a consequence, there're many false alarms, of which this was one.
I counted at least four trucks arriving on the scene, all for naught.
My building's concierge talking to a very cute fireman
When it comes to packaging their product, Vitamin Water gets it right__Bloor St. W.
With this brightly-coloured binder, there's no excuse to forget your homework__Shoppers Drug Mart__Yonge St.
I can see myself in this dress, though I've no clue what's going on at the waistline__Le Chateau__Yonge St.
I blame Kanye for this trend__Ardene
Visually-arresting M.A.C. poster
Rafters reflects the black-and-white trend with this lovely rug
This suit has St. Tropez written all over it__The Bay
Saw this in Shoppers Drug Mart
Aww...barf.
American Apparel poster__Holt Renfrew Centre
Be an ass for Puma
On the makeup counter at Pharma Plus drugstore
I was passing through the bookstore when lo and behold, there was A.J. Jacobs, who in his black thick-rimmed glasses, looked and sounded like a younger Jerry Lewis
Mr. Cheekbones himself, Christian Bale
Sigh...Eric Bana
Vs. has convinced me that when it comes to fashion magazines, it's better to "go big or go home". Their publication has the size and heft of a coffee table book and is just as worthy of being a collector's item. Unfortunately, at $20 a pop, I'll have to content myself with mere browsing.
WANT: Cesare Paciotti sequined sandals__Elle UK
Fetishistic Alexander McQueen thigh high boots on Rachel Weisz__Elle UK
Hot model__Esquire__Sep.09
Behind those trees lies Sassafraz
Hot boots at Specchio
Specchio sits like a jewel at the corner of Bay & Cumberland
Boldly graphic storefront__Red Letter
The Guild Shop introduced me to the wonderful world of Canadian craft
Lunch on the patio at MBCo (Montreal Bread Company), founded by Peter Morentzos
Peter Morentzos – Restaurant Master of Montreal
MRG: Morentzos Restaurant Group
Karakashian Rug Gallery
Great hair salon poster__Zefir
Would you buy a $1.1 million condo from these people?.jpg)
An inside look at this mecca for expensive gourmet fare.jpg)
Only one gluten-free dessert option, last time I checked.jpg)
This may be why I'm broke...
...but at least they were delicious
"Little Red Corvette....jpg)
...baby you're much too fast"
I enjoy the emotional quality of this painting...
...if not the murky, muddy colour__Framed by Izzy
Inside the new Diesel.jpg)
Modern lighting makes a bold statement.jpg)
Cute hanging pendant
This is, without a doubt, the most popular store on the block.jpg)
Their arrangements are an eclectic mix of ethnic, country, bohemian and vintage-inspired pieces.jpg)
The prices are reasonable too.jpg)
I plan to come back when my budget allows it
It's ordered chaos.jpg)
Vintage-inspired display
Striking floral pattern on this chair.jpg)
The Upset: Young Contemporary Art
Stunning colour at the Bra Bar Boutique
Newly opened Ace Lifestyle tempts me into learning golf with these cute shoes__Hazelton Lanes
Yorkville Design Centre__Hazelton Lanes
Serpentine just opened in the old Hugo location
It's got a cool, tattoo parlour vibe which is atypical for the neighbourhood
Their helmets make me want a biker boyfriend so bad
I saw a hot pair of black velvet pant leggings (pleggings?) which I'm sure weren't cheap
I love the industrial lighting
Can I get this wallpaper for my bedroom?
Co-owner Paul sports some serious ink and jewelry
