Fucking Losers

I thought frosted tips went out with the Sony Walkman.

Gawker.com has brought to my attention the awesomeness that is Nik Richie. I tried to post a comment there but I'm having a hard time accessing the stream. Thank god I have a blog for just such an occasion. I wish to preserve this comment for eternity cause goshdarnit, it's a beaut. Behold, my no-holds-barred opinion of this gift to humanity...

missdelite: OMG, where's this hunk of man meat been hiding? His physique reduces me to a puddle of drool. It's like I'm drowning in my own desire! His look is so effin hot: 1 part sleazeball club promoter to 2 parts pet serial killer, slathered in Vegas used car salesman smarm. I bet he's got sweaty palms, rank breath & skid marks on the tighty whities his mom still buys him for Christmas. Swoon! Dare I speculate on his prowess in the bedroom? I do! I'd climb his pole & plant the flag if it weren't for the 'Monogamous Adonis' vibe he oozes from every pore. Siiiigh. WHY, dear god, are all the good ones taken??

Thing is, this jackass doesn't realize he's being USED by a culture of male resentment which is sacrificing his reputation at the altar of their chauvinism. The men who patronize his site wouldn't dare utter those cheap shots in a mixed, public arena where women are actually physically present, but thank bejeezus Hamoon Karamian exists to represent their insecurities & give them a place to vent. He's like the runty little dick in every group of male friends who they beat up on in a passive-aggressive, jokey sort of way. Where would these guys be without TheDirty? That's easy! Drinking, snorting & fucking their lives into oblivion amongst a tight group of friends while complaining about how their women are bleeding them dry. Oh but wait - that still goes on! Only now, they get to commiserate with millions of anonymous cowards online. It's like an army of whiny roaches high-fiving their way to a colostomy bag & an ever-dwindling retirement package. Score! Where do I sign up to suck the crotch sweat off their limp whiskey dicks while crying tears of gratitude for their convenient hospitality? I mean, I'm just begging to be used, right?

Right???

FUCKING LOSERS.

The Man Behind TheDirty.com Is Just As Awful In Person
The Man Behind TheDirty.com Is Still A Self-Aggrandizing Dick

We Can't Afford Ford

When Rob Ford Becomes Mayor...
[EXCERPT]
But here’s the most disturbing truth of all: it’s not worth going into detail about the city Rob Ford promises because it’s pure fantasy. Mayor Rob Ford has absolutely no chance of enacting his agenda and will, as a result, grind the city to a halt, undoing seven or more years of progress and creating a situation much like the one he claims he’s addressing now.

Reality One: basic math
Ford’s numbers simply do not add up. The cuts he proposes to “waste” at City Hall are almost purely symbolic — a footnote to the budget — and are dwarfed by the $250 million a year in revenue that would be lost from his elimination of the vehicle-registration tax and land-transfer tax. That scenario alone would make his expansion of customer service, police service and subway building impossible. Meanwhile, cancelling new streetcar orders and discarding the ones we have while buying fleets of new buses would create hundreds of millions of dollars in new costs and vastly increase the operating shortfall of the TTC. We simply could not afford it.

Reality Two: he can’t boss the province around
Much of what Ford wants to do — notably cutting the size of council — would depend on provincial legislation McGuinty or any other premier would never approve. And his great transit scheme? At the moment, the province is paying for $3.7 billion worth of the Transit City plan Ford wants to scrap. Do you think they’ll continue giving him the money to use for his own devices?

Reality three: He can’t really boss anyone around
Finally, even before things get to the provincial level, Ford wouldn’t have the authority to get his ideas past the council level. He could set the agenda and make appointments to committees, but he — as outgoing Councillor Howard Moscoe put it — “could not pass wind” without winning a vote at council.

This is a problem for Ford more than any other candidate because he has shown no history of being able to work with anyone on anything. He proudly told me in 2006 that even council’s right wing hated him (“I don’t want to eat lunch with those guys anyway,” he said). It’s easy to forget now that even Mel Lastman considered Ford an enemy.

So who would accept the kamikaze mission of being his budget chief, charged with making his magical numbers add up? Who would sit on his transit commission, trying to keep the trains running while negotiating the stiff penalties and absurd demands of his platform? No one who knows anything about finance or transit, that’s for sure.

A CITY IN DECLINE
What we’re actually facing is gridlock and regression. Why? Because we’re looking at four years of angry shouting and a loud, probably unproductive argument between Ford and council (and between Ford and the province and between Ford and the city’s labour unions and between Ford and city staff…).

He might well succeed in stopping progress altogether in a few areas: grinding Transit City to a halt, cutting some taxes and slashing spending on arts and cultural programs. The city’s years-in-progress bike plan might be scrapped or halted, environmental progress rolled back. But Ford would replace those with nothing.

The opportunity cost — what we’ll miss out on by taking no action — will be huge. Development will slow as the planning department becomes paralyzed by political deadlock. Transit growth will stop and basic maintenance and service will be cut as the commission endlessly debates how to square financial and contractual circles. Basic infrastructure will be neglected. In short, the city will start to rot.

And, most distressingly for a penny-pincher like Ford, our financial hole will just keep getting bigger following tax cuts while pressing budget and revenue problems go unaddressed, forcing steep tax hikes or drastic service cuts or, most likely, both.

Then by the time the next election rolls around, everyone will be even angrier and perhaps we really will be a city in decline.

King St. West

A Toronto District Gets Creative
On weekends, King Street West between Spadina Avenue and Bathurst Street is like one long fashion runway, with its see-and-be-seen restaurants, bars and clubs. During the week, it's where a group of particularly creative local residents work, in entertainment and design, and where many live, too, in the loft-style condo developments sprouting up by the day.

Introducing: Scarpetta, the Thompson Hotel's New York Restaurant Import

Italian @ Buca

Points of Attraction

What makes a person attractive? For me, it goes beyond looks and intelligence and I've come up with a point system to illustrate this. I apply it to both men and women in an attempt to adequately assess the potential for a rewarding relationship and I encourage you to do the same, but please keep in mind that this is a work in progress.

MISSDELITE'S ATTRACTION SCORECARD

LOOKS (2 points)
>Refers to public physical appearance.
>2 points because some features may be a turn on while others are not. Eg. I give Gerard Butler 1 point for having a somewhat handsome face & good body when he's fit and bearded Eric Bana 2 points (he looked good in "The Other Boleyn Girl").
>Includes sex appeal: a softer, more sensual side indicates the person is in touch with their animal instincts. Rawr.

INTELLIGENCE (3 points)
>1 point for book smarts, 1 point for street smarts and 1 point for relationship smarts. I won't waste my time with an Einstein who can't read a road map, a hustler who can't spell for shit or a serial cheater.
>Includes analytic intelligence: the ability to assess a situation and determine the right course of action.
>Includes attention to detail: it's one thing to acknowledge the bigger picture, but do they also pick up on the finer points?
>Includes environmental awareness: how well does your companion notice what's going on around him/her? Is the house burning down while they discuss Newton's Law of Physics? Save yourself and don't look back.

SENSE OF HUMOUR (1 point)
>Genuine laughter is such a turn on.
>Can they tell a funny joke? Can they take one?
>Are they more inclined to an upbeat disposition?
>Impossible to have one if they're not relaxed and comfortable in their own skin, which explains my lifelong aversion to Robin Williams' "schtick".

SENSE OF DECENCY (7 points)
>Absolutely crucial. I'll never understand why some people are attracted to tyrants like Mel Gibson.
>Breakdown: generosity of spirit (1), empathy (1), classiness (1), dignity/pride (1), diplomacy/tact (1), honesty (1) and conscience (1).

PHYSICAL HEALTH (3 points)
>1 point for awareness of what it takes to be healthy, 1 point for execution and 1 point for consistency.
>I rule out addicts of ALL stripes. If they don't care what they put in their body/can't help self-abuse, there's no future for us.
>Includes: adherence to a healthy diet, regular exercise, sleep patterns, fresh air/sunshine consumption, personal/environmental hygiene and stress management.

RESILIENCE (4 points)
>How well do they rebound from setbacks? How thick is their skin? Do they crumble into an emotional wreck at the slightest provocation?
>Breakdown: effort put forth (1), persistence (1), patience (1) and learning from mistakes (1).

CONFIDENCE (2 points)
> You either are or you're not, but I give 1 point for confidence in the workplace and 1 point for confidence in personal relationships.
>Are they confident enough to take (calculated) risks? Do they trust their instincts and demonstrate a good sense of timing? Do they accept or shy away from a challenge?

DISCIPLINE (3 points)
>Sometimes, restraint is an asset. How well does the person resist manipulation, temptation and peer pressure? Do they have good anger management skills? Do they take care of their body or shove whatever comes along into their gaping maw? And yes, I'm aware of the overlap with "HEALTH" - but go figure - you can't have one without the other.
>1 point for discipline in the workplace, 1 for in personal relationships and 1 for in personal health.


CREATIVITY (4 points)
>This includes two spheres: 1. Innovation at work and in one's personal life (ie. Do they demonstrate flexibility in their thinking and venture "outside of the box"?) and 2. an appreciation for the Arts. Do they paint, compose or dance? Are they moved by artistic expression?
>Breakdown: workplace creativity (1), innovation in personal life situations (1), artistic expression (1) and artistic enjoyment (1).

Total: 29 points

Ok, whew! That's quite a list. Yes, I know "people aren't perfect" blah blah blah, but the objective of this exercise is to expand the definition of "attractive". Oftentimes, we sell ourselves and each other short by stubbornly adhering to criteria that's far more limited in its scope. Don't get me wrong: if you don't like what you see from the get-go, then it's near-impossible to force oneself into a rewarding relationship, but there's so much MORE to take into account when assessing another person than we've been led to believe by TV, movies, magazines etc.

Also, notice that I've left work-related success off the list. Is he an astronaut or is she a doctor? Fine - obviously they've ample book smarts, discipline and persistence, but it's my belief that society labels accomplished people as "successful" while disregarding important factors like access to opportunities (ie. there's no such thing as a "level playing field" in the work environment) and a sense of human decency. In other words, it doesn't mean squat to me if Mr./Ms. X won the Nobel Peace Prize if they're a bona fide JACKASS in real life.

And this: let's say achieving a perfect score is an unrealistic goal for just about everybody. Well, fine! No need to fret - these are mere guidelines that challenge the boundaries of our expectations. Besides, even if you could achieve a perfect 29, what're the odds of meeting another 29? Slim to nil. BUT, if you - let's say - score low on health and human decency, chances are greater you'll meet someone who does too and both of you can enjoy time spent together devouring Twinkies for breakfast while shooting pigeons with homemade slingshots. After all, isn't depravity better accomplished with company??

Ciao 4 Now

We only part to meet again. - John Gay

My Internet and cable bill is due on Friday and I can't pay it.

Guess how much money I have right now?

$250.

Yup. The last of my escort earnings cause I haven't seen any clients in a month.

A month.

To say I'm at a crossroads in my life is an understatement. I've no clue what to do, what can be done, or where my next dollar is going to come from, but I do know that I don't want to spend anymore time with strange men.

It's just too much to bear.

As much as it kills me to say it, I've Mr. Kamikaze to thank for my change of heart. Don't get me wrong - I was never cut out for this line of work - but being with him reminded me what it's like to be with someone I can truly connect with on a deeper level. It made being with other men I wasn't interested in that much harder. I turned down more calls than usual and suffered financially as a result. It's too bad he turned out to be such a disappointment - but given his track record - I was better off without him.

I don't know how much longer I'm going to have internet service, so I figure now is as good a time as any to put the kibosh on my blogging. It's eaten into too much of my time, and I feel like I need to make a fresh start, anyway. The Internet has exposed me to a lot of interesting things over the past 2-and-a-half years, and I'm proud of what I've amassed. I think my blogs serve as a snapshot of contemporary culture, and hopefully people will use them as a resource and source of inspiration.

I can never truly quit the web, so I imagine I'll pop up somewhere at sometime under a different name and I'm sure my voice will be familiar to those who've been hanging around here long enough. I'll always have an opinion and an eagerness to explore other peoples' exciting endeavours, so it wouldn't surprise me one bit if I became involved in creating a new, legitimate website focusing on all aspects of 21st century living.

Until then, I'll just have to cool my heels and pray for change in the right direction.

Ciao 4 now...

missdelite
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Psst - I'll be storing pics and links @ Uber Friendlee. It's not a blog, I swear!
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Having a Bawl

Why Women Cry: Because We're Pissed Off
COMMENTS
I cry mainly out of frustration...and then get indignant about it, because the person on the other end gets self-important. It never solves anything!

Excellent point about gender conditioning here.

While women tend to cry when frustrated (you know, because angry isn't lady-like), men tend to get mad. An angry person who's (typically) bigger than you is intimidating at the core and has much more potential to influence the outcome of an argument than tears. After all, tears might play on our emotions, but anger and intimidation create fear. Has "Jonathan" considered that maybe his girlfriend starts crying during an argument because his anger is scaring her?

So if we assume that women cry during arguments to manipulate an argument, we must also assume that any time a man gets angry, he is doing so to scare his partner. This is a reductive and really sad way to look at complex relationships and emotions. But what else to expect from a column titled "The Trouble with Women"?

As a dude, let me say that I know very few men, if any, who are well-equipped to deal with/express their anger at all.

I, and most of the men I know, were brought up to repress our feelings b/c feelings and emotion "were for pussies".

Well let me tell you how well that has worked out ...

Sad? = Angry
Hurt? = Angry
Ashamed/Embarrassed? = Angry

In short, any non-happy emotion correlates to anger and anger alone.

One of these days I am gonna need a really expensive shrink.

Or I'll just drink until I have a heart attack.

When I got bitched out at work by a manager from another group and my manager for hurting someone's feelings (really, it was sarcasm and it wasn't even directed at him), I went out to my car, called my wife, and started bawling.

It isn't just a woman thing.

I think men are taught to channel anger into physical confrontation or to swallow it and take it out on someone else later.

What are women taught to do with their anger?
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Web 3.0

Welcome to Web 3.0
LETTER TO THE EDITOR
As is so often the case, Joshua Errett has no idea what he's talking about. Apple's App Store isn't the anti-Internet: it's just another online store. It isn't elitist and it isn't policed, at least not in the totalitarian way Errett alludes to. All stores, whether online or bricks-and-mortar, decide what they will and will not sell, and can and do change their minds. Is that a problem?

Do I have a right to walk into a store and demand that they sell my product? Should I be able to install a Toyota part in my Honda?

It's clear that Errett hates Apple, like so many of the fanboys who litter tech blogs.

RELATED
How Web 3.0 Will Work
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5 Little Words

If I had the means, I'd say these 5 little words.

I'd say them as often as possible, to people who needed to hear them and would value them the most.

I'd say them to people who are:
passionate,
intelligent,
talented,
creative,
innovative,
visionary,
driven,
daring,
kind and
sincere.

I'd say them freely and without a sense of obligation.

I'd feel good about saying them.

I wouldn't expect anything in return for saying them, knowing these words wouldn't be taken for granted.

I'd wish others said these words more often.

I'd know that by saying these words, I was doing my part to enrichen and strengthen - not only my community - but society at large.

I'd say these words to bolster necessary social structures that are already strained to their limit or to create ones that don't even exist.

I'd say these words to prevent good people from falling through the cracks.

I'd hope that these words would be passed on from one beneficiary to another.

What are these words?

How

much

do

you

need...?

?

?

?

But that's just me.
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I'm Not Me

Columbia University: The Best Place to Score Drugs in New York
COMMENT
I've had a prescription for adderall since I was 10. It's kind of sad, actually. I don't know who I am and I'm never sure whether it's me or the pills, and I'll probably never completely get off them because they're a part of who I am. That said, I abuse them like crazy. I'm on it right now actually, sitting in the library of a northeastern liberal arts college, heart pounding, high (if you will) with the kind of euphoria that drives me to achieve beyond any means of which I'd otherwise be capable. I've also been up for three straight days, haven't eaten anything since Saturday and am about to start a 20 page paper due Tuesday. And it'll be the best damn paper I've ever written. Then I'll rage with whatever I have leftover at post-exam parties. I prefer not to think about my health and sanity and chalk my ignorance up to the innocence of youth.
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Snark Attack

What oil spill?
Those are the healing waters of BP's new spa retreat for asthmatic Tea Baggers. It also cures eczema and plantars wart, but may aggravate chronic acne and induce nausea in eco-conscious individuals.
[via]
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NEW POST
Industrial Toll
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You're Hired

Prom king zombie costume

What NOT to Write in Your Cover Letter
A word to the wise - the following email incorporates everything you should not tell a potential future employer. Hopefully, everyone can learn from this person's mistakes! [...]

The Five People You Meet in [the] Hamptons
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NEW POSTS
Samantha Harris
Deranged Dowager
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Hold Your Ground

Ever been engaged in a heated, low down, dirty, rotten war of words with someone? I was, yesterday morning. It started at 3:15 am when - after a long series of exchanges - I texted back to this big, fat, old, ugly, mess of a man to "CHOKE on his 'Sorry'" (because it was insincere) and then "GOODBYE, M__". I thought that was the end of it - but oh no - a bully always has to have the last word, even when they don't have a leg to stand on. From that point on, our communication escalated into a one upmanship nightmare.

6 hours later, when I checked my messages, there was his putrid response, littered with insults and lies. Do you think I was going to let him get away with it? Hell naw! I fired back a volley of my own, and then off we went, careening down a mountain of shit through verbally-charged minefields. Pow! Bang! Kablowey! All the while, I held my own and wouldn't back down. I gave as good as I got, and then some. By the end, I made that sonofabitch my bitch and gave him something to think about the next time he decides to engage an opponent he grossly underestimates.

Yesterday, I learned something about myself: I don't suffer fools at all. When you're wrong, you're wrong, and I won't hesitate to tell you. Of course, me being 5'5", this type of engagement is only possible in a non-physical arena, such as texting. Even engaging an opponent over the phone is ineffectual if their voice's louder and resonates deeper than my own - they can easily shout me down, no problem. But when it comes to a war of words - ie. ideas and values distilled - I'm not intimidated because my convictions fortify me against their bullshit. No one can convince me I'm wrong when I know in the depths of my soul I'm not, no matter how old, loud, big or "successful" they are.

I saved my half of the exchange. I've been reading it over and over again, proud of my audacity. It's not easy standing up to an older man, especially when you've been raised in an environment that was dominated by your father. I never said a damn word that contradicted my father's, in his presence or elsewhere. He was omniscient to me, and it wasn't until I hit my twenties that I started to question his perspective. Naturally, that's when our relationship fell apart, as I believe is common between fathers and daughters. As long as females remain little girls - both mentally and physically - Daddy's a happy man. The imbalance of power allows him to feel heroic and superior. But as soon as we start to mature, experiment and take ownership of our existence, he feels left out and threatened. This, of course, is when it's time for us to pack our bags and leave home.

Unfortunately, most of us women never get over our father's influence, and his presence in our mindset is reflected in how we relate to other men - be they partners, authority figures, other relatives or offspring. It's like his stamp of approval/disapproval is evident in the eyes of the males we encounter, and we lose perspective of what and who we're truly dealing with. These men are not him, but it's difficult to make the distinction. His gaze haunts us, even when he's thousands of miles away. It's downright spooky. I have to say, a man has to be one helluva strong character himself to break through the bubble of a father's influence; weak men just don't stand a chance.

So...do you want to see my texts? I have to warn you - it ain't pretty. Mr. Ass Pustule said some really foul things that don't bear repeating, but I think you can fill in the blanks, anyway. I'll add a few words here and there to clarify things, but other than that, you're on your own.

Got your helmet on?

Ok, we're going in...

The set up: At 3:15 am, I told him to "CHOKE on his 'sorry'" and then "GOODBYE, M__". 6 hours later, he starts the insult ball rolling by calling me a phony and implying that I deserve to be in the financial trouble I'm in. Me:

I never liked you. You're one of the ugliest men I've ever met, both inside and out. I'm GLAD I don't have to see you again or let you touch me.

Added:

FYI: Guys like you will ALWAYS have to pay for it, one way or the other. Don't worry, I've ALREADY lost your number.

He insults my looks and tells me I'm a lousy lay. This couldn't possibly be further from the truth. (Backstory: He's complained numerous times in the past about his nutjob wife.)

LIES. ALL LIES. I know sour grapes when I see them, you pathetic monster. Good luck with your CRAZY ASS wife.

He says I've turned him off from prostitutes. What he doesn't know is that I think the profession is a crock of shit. He also says that I should suck his c--k. Fucking loser can't even spell out the word.

You're welcome. Too bad only RETARDS, CRACKHEADS & YOUR CRAZY ASS WIFE will suck your COCK.

At this point, he's starting to weaken. Was it the jab about his wife or his lack of sexual desireability? He tells me to leave him alone.

You're the one who contacted ME. I was done with you HOURS AGO.

He says he feels sorry for me.

Coming from you, that means NOTHING.

He insists that I'm the one who initiated this shitstorm.

NO. My last message to you at 3:15 am said GOODBYE, M__. You're the one with Alzheimers, crazy OLD man. NOT ME.

He calls me a cunt.

I have a beautiful CUNT & you will NEVER see it again. THANK GOD.

He says he's glad about that, as if he wasn't the one harassing me to date him over the past year-and-a-half. At this point I'm into all caps because I sense he's faltering and his jugular's exposed.

AT LEAST WE AGREE ON SOMETHING. I HOPE YOUR COCK FALLS OFF & YOU ROT IN HELL. NOW FUCK OFF.

You'd think he'd back down, right? Walk away with what's left of his dignity intact? Uh uh - this fucker keeps coming back for more. His next insult's so lame I don't remember what it was.

YOU FIGHT LIKE A 12 YEAR OLD GIRL. PATHETIC.

Again he tells me to leave him alone, even though he's the one who can't stop responding.

I'M DONE WHEN YOU'RE DONE, BITCH.

He recycles more lame shit from before.

YOU'RE REPEATING YOURSELF. GET IT OVER WITH & JUST DIE ALREADY.

He tells me I'm no better than the shit clogging his ass. I'm officially bored with him and want to end it.

FINALLY YOU ADMIT THAT YOU'RE FULL OF SHIT. GOODBYE, ASSWIPE.

Is he done yet? No, not even close. He texts "Cunt" again. I fire back with something equally caustic that I know will set him off.

FAG.

Ha! I was right. He phones me - which of course - I ignore. I can't, however, resist listening to his message. He sounds tired - not irate like I expected - and tells me he won't let me drag him through the muck, as if I was the one who insulted him first, and then he crosses the line into bottomfeeder territory by intimating that my estrangement from my parents is a reflection of the kind of person I am. Well, sweet-Jesus-and-all-that's-holy, I really let him have it. (Backstory: he's mentioned before how much he spoils his kids - especially his son. If the young man - not child - so much as stumps his toe, Big Daddy Handout is on the next flight out before it's begun to swell.)

GET OFF YOUR HIGH HORSE, MOTHERFUCKER. YOUR KIDS DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU. AS SOON AS THE MONEY'S GONE, SO ARE THEY.

Silence.

FYI: YOU'RE THE ONE WHO STOOPED TO NAME CALLING. NOT ME. FINALLY YOU'VE MET SOMEONE WHO WON'T BE BULLIED & YOU DON'T LIKE IT. GOOD. SUCK ON IT.

Silence.

Silence.

Silence.

-

-

-

Check and mate.

I win.
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Fucking Hypocrite

SWAT Team Raids House, Shoots Dog Over 'Small Amount of Marijuana'
COMMENTS
Thank god they got rid of it. Kids in the house?
Thank god.

That's horse shit to expose children to that stuff.

"WTF what are you guys doing?" ---They are busting you for being an illegal drug user. Now sit down and take your PWN.

If you don't want to be harassed, don't break the law. Doesn't matter if YOU don't feel pot is illegal. Your country has determined it is, don't agree? Don't live there, or take it up with the courts/congressmen/etc.

missdelite: You don't have any vices, do you? And you don't know anyone close to you who does, right? And obviously, you've never been harassed by law enforcement officers or handed an unfair verdict in court or known someone who has, is this true?

How else to explain your blind faith in the judiciary process and your inability to see an abuse of power when it's right there before you? Just because someone - who believe me, has no vested interest in your wellbeing - makes a ruling, you believe they're doing it to protect your interests.

Bwahahaha! How precious! What kind of glass muthaf@kn house do you live in, anyway??

I'm willing to bet my left butt cheek you're married or related to one of the guys who helped come up with or who actively enforces these Draconian drug laws, and he's holed up in a seedy motel room in Amsterdam right now snorting coke out of a hooker's gash.

How lucky do you feel, you fucking hypocrite?

missdelite: And you know what's funny? Law enforcement wastes precious time, money and resources on these small-time crooks while the kingpins roam free and unmolested.

As long as police chiefs can hold press conferences boasting about their number of arrests, and politicians can line their pockets with more money from taxpayers to fight the "War on Drugs", eveybody's happy.

But what about the kid OD'ed in a derelict warehouse, lying in a pool of vomit and excrement with a needle stuck in his/her arm? Are they just collateral damage from whom everyone else profits?
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TRAILERS
Blow
American Gangster
Scarface
Goodfellas
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LINK
Resolved: Inmates Make Tough Debaters
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Cash is Trash

Picasso Sells for Record $106.5 Million
COMMENTS
Even in terms of rich people economics this makes no sense to me. I love Picasso, don't get me wrong, but in todays buyers market I could probably buy a small island, a Gulfstream jet to transport me, and finance my supervillain-esque island compound for that price.

reply: Cash is trash.

Art can be sold overseas, is easily transported, and is untraceable. You can also claim it as assets on a balance sheet.

It's a better investment than something as louche as bouillon.

Art is always valuable as a vehicle for money laundering. Not that I think there's anything wrong with that from an ethical standpoint, it's just that's what it's for.

But in this case, when cubism goes out of fashion eventually, what's a billionaire to do? New art crazes are always happening, but they ain't making any more islands (if Dubai's real estate collapse goes as expected. Just bide your time...).

reply: Eh, eventually, the art market will fall apart, as it always does.

Buyers pick it up for "legacy" and to pad their egos. You're a pretty big pimp among rich people if you have a Picasso. How rich you are stops mattering so much at a certain point.

That's when you start buying art, bankrolling "grassroots" political machines, producing art, running philanthropies, etc.

When cubism stops being cool, you donate the paintings to a prominent museum.

It may also be a symptom of the stimulus boom. The smart money will dump cash when inflation is coming without many prospects for alternative investments.

I mean, it's a pretty fucking sweet deal when you can use ZIRP to buy Picassos for nothing. I'd do that deal many times over.

When political risk is high, it's also a great time to dump your cash reserves into easily smuggled assets.

Remind me to hire you as my accountant and general financial adviser when I attain my empire. You seem like you'd keep a cool head and manage to get me a sweet deal when the revolution overthrows my totalitarian regime. In all seriousness though, your perspective on art as an investment for the super-rich is really intriguing and has educated me as to why these people think a Picasso may be worth 0.1Bn dollars. It makes total sense in the same way that any other stable alternative to cash does.

reply: Accounting, you'd have to find someone else. General financial advisor, sure.

But I'd loooooove to have a Canadian work visa, at least for a time. Canada is the atheist Saudi Arabia with plenty of mines to boot.

A lot to love about the culture, at least.

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Sotheby's Preview Work of Tamara de Lempicka
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10 Career Don'ts

Fashion Design

10 Career Don'ts: Or How NOT to Get a Career in Fashion
3. Don’t roll your eyes. Or if you do, roll with them toward the exit sign and then head out the door. [...]

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I'm Scared

You'd think a purse that looks like a gaping vagina would be full of money, don't you?

Hey, guys - guess who's officially a squatter? Me! I didn't pay my rent on Friday cause I don't have it. Guess who sucks (figuratively) at being an escort? I do!

I HATE MY JOB.

There's no personal fulfillment in trying to satisfy someone you don't care about. I don't care how many Happy Hooker stories you read. Belle de Jour and Diary of a London Call Girl can kiss my ass. I've become enlightened to the ways of privileged white female prostitutes, and they're playing in a whole other ball game than the rest of us. Apparently, white skin = better, even though I've left behind men with a smile on their face who'd beg to differ.

MEN LIKE ME. SOMETIMES EVEN TOO MUCH TO PAY FOR IT.

Unfortunately, I've no marketable skills. If I did, do you think I'd be doing what I do? I didn't choose my line of work - I fell into it out of necessity. And if you think I'm going to work three minimum wage jobs to pay the bills, then think again. I'd like to think there's more to life than slave labour, and I've more to offer the world than shiny toilets and a pleasant phone manner. I wasn't built to wipe some old guy's ass while he looks down my top and drools on my shoe. I'd rather hop on a bus with my last few bucks and ride to the middle of nowhere, curl up in a field and wait for the vermin to gnaw me to death.

I HAVEN'T SEEN A DENTIST IN TWO YEARS.

I'd like to take this opportunity to thank my Dad for telling my Mom, when I was in high school, that I didn't need a summer job cause my time would be better spent taking art classes and writing book reports. Those summers I spent struggling through "Pilgrim's Progress" and "The Prince and the Pauper" really didn't pay off. Those water colours I dabbled in aren't worth the cost of the supplies it took to make them. The summers I spent volunteering (my idea) at the Canadian National Institute for the Blind, Women's College and Sunnybrook hospitals, looked great on my resume, but never put a dime in my pocket in terms of helping me to garner future employment.

I'VE NEVER WORKED A 'REAL' JOB IN MY ENTIRE LIFE.

And thanks, Dad, for pushing me to do pre-med at university even though I had no natural affinity for physics and chemistry and no desire to be a doctor. The ensuing disillusionment that settled in after dropping out, deepened my psychological development while forcing me to question my identity. If I wasn't going to be a doctor healing sick African babies (his dream, not mine), then who the fuck am I??

EVERYTHING MY FATHER EVER TOLD ME WAS TRUE TURNED OUT TO BE UTTERLY AND COMPLETELY FALSE.

And so here I am, destitute. My "busines", such as it was, never recovered from the dive it took when the markets crashed over a year-and-a-half ago. I'm like one of those small businesses that did just okay enough to survive before the recession, that's now cleared out, boarded up and a hollow landmark to someone else's livelihood. Funny, I've yet to see one media report about what happens to those people after they've finally thrown in the towel. I guess those kinds of stories don't sell rags or increase pageviews. But how the rich are sacrificing by cutting back junior's hockey practices from three times a week to two? Now that's a story! Run with it!

I DREAD CALLING MY CONDO MANAGER TOMORROW.

Needless to say, if things don't turn around for me in a dramatic way over the next few days, I'm out on my ass. I don't know where I'll end up, cause I'm too scared to think that far ahead. (Liar - it's all I've been thinking about for months now.) I hope I can continue to stay where I am, and get out of the business in a way that doesn't turn my life upside down, but I have to say at this point, it looks like it's going to take a fucking miracle. I'm supposed to meet someone tomorrow night who's well-connected and could possibly open some doors for me, but he's not exactly reliable.

I'LL FUCKING TAKE WHAT I CAN GET.

Oh, and one more thing?

I DON'T FUCKING DESERVE THIS.

Modern Hooker

What does it take, to make it as a fake?

Injected to avoid feeling rejected.

WHCD 2010: The Red Carpet
COMMENT
missdelite: That's it. If I ever see Kim Kardashian in a Hollywood movie, I'm going to shoot myself. At least Simpson and Bieber can sing, fer chrissakes.

Pop Quiz! Kim Kardashian is famous because:
a)golden shower sex tape
b)daddy's Bruce Jenner
c)face + tit + butt surgeries = Tinseltown "pretty"
d)she's servicing every dessicated studio exec from New York to L.A.
e)she's a modern Al Qaeda Mata Hari
f)the world's a sad, muthaf@kn place where only the crass survive
g)all of the above

If you chose g) then ding ding! We have a winner! Now go cry yourself to sleep and pray that she's such a bitch in real life, her make up artist snaps and stabs her in the butt with a MAC lip pencil, causing her to drown in a pool of her own saline solution. Horndogs around the world will mourn her loss for 2.2 seconds before they move on to the next bimbo in a tight dress. It's the circle of life 2010 celebrity style! Aren't you glad you came along for the ride??
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How Dare She?

Halle Berry is Single and Other Exciting News for Guys
COMMENTS
I doubt Gabriel Aubry will have trouble finding another woman who is both younger and more beautiful than Halle Berry. One who will hopefully have fewer "issues" than Halle.

Also, Halle Berry has had two husbands who cheated on her, a boyfriend who beat the hell out of her and now a baby-daddy who has left her. They all leave HER!! Not a good track record. Obviously, beauty is not everything. Maybe Halle has nothing else to offer the men who come into her life; perhaps she has too much baggage; perhaps she is a boring lump of insecurity. Men get tired of that shit, no matter how beautiful the woman is.

So, yeah, Halle will find another man (if she wants one) but will things turn out any better for her? Will she be happy again? I don't think so. Halle fucking Berry is not a happy woman.

missdelite: *sniffff*

I can smell the resentment from here.

You know that itch you can't scratch? It's actually caused by bathrobe crumbs worming their way into every orifice of your being. Soon you'll be nothing but a pile of Cheeto dust and cat hair moistened by the tears of your lost youth. A forensic team will sift through your moldy remains and conclude that death was caused by the rupture of a jealousy-induced ulcer that slowly over the years ate away at you from the inside out.

After hearing about your terrible fate, Jon Stewart will launch into a tirade on his show about the rise in deaths by Gossip Exhaustion. Word will reach Halle Berry and she'll offer to scatter your ashes from the deck of her 200 ft yacht parked in Port de Saint Tropez while her hunky assistant in the tightest shorts imaginable gently cradles her Oscar and looks on in admiration. His aviators will reflect the flashes of paparazzi bulbs, the locals will cheer, and your moment of glory will finally be realized, all thanks to Halle "Who the Hell Does She Think She is, Anyway?" Berry.

Back at your place, a lonely cat howls with hunger, waiting to be fed..
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Snark Attack

Did a Law Student 'Cat Fight' Lead to Harvard's Racist Email Scandal?
COMMENT
So she's into white supremacy,who cares?!
I do. And everyone who's ever been the victim of racism does.

As Penn (from Penn & Tellers TV show) said maybe you guys are just to weak for the first amendment.
Penn's your hero? Now THAT'S weak.

You can't in allow health care rallies than ban Tea Party events.
Write a proper sentence, for fuck's sake.

You support Pride Marches and then Ban KKK Meetings.
Yup. But don't worry - you can recycle those sheets and a little bleach will get out the blood of my ancestors.

Everyone one needs to be heard and not dismissed.
Incorrect. Case in point: pedophiles, bestiality enthusiasists, incestuous grandparents and a commenter named "quickstrike".

I feel that Stephanie Grace is wrong, however I resepect her opinion.
She's a lucky woman to have earned your "resepect". That's like a budding chef being praised for his knife skills by Jeffrey Dahmer.

"While I may not agree with what she says, I will defend to the death her right to say it!"
Go ahead. I won't stop you. And if you don't succeed the first time, you're in luck cause this won't be the last time Ms.Grace puts her foot in her mouth.

And you know what? The irony is, I don't think Stephie would welcome your support. She's an elitist Harvard law student and you sound like you fell off the back of a turnip truck. If it makes you feel better, maybe one day you'll meet her at a Klan rally and she'll let you light her cross-burning match. You can remind her of the day you went to bat for her and she'll look at you as if you're dipped in shit, but at least you'll walk away feeling good about defending her right to regard you as the jackass that you are.
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LINK
It Could Be True
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Who Were They?

Harvard Law Student Starts Racist Email War, Will Clerk for Cow Porn Judge This Summer
COMMENTS
I'm not sure what the normal reaction to dissent here on Gawker is (as my silly name indicates, I spend most of my time on Deadspin). At the risk of being assailed with the sort of profanity-laced anger that this story has generated, I must say that I don't share in the rather broad view of what constitutes "racism" among the majority of commenters here.

The mere suggestion that it is possible that intelligence - however one might define it in this instance - is not distributed precisely equally among all racial groups does not, in and of itself, constitute racism in my opinion. So long as one does not extend that conclusion to any sort of moral or legal judgment that implicates the group, I don't see it as bigotry. Speaking personally, I avoid judgments about any group, and stick to individuals. Quaint as that notion is. But I digress . . .

Put another way - the refusal to keep an open mind that the results of some hypothetical (perhaps impossible) scientific experiment may run counter to one's pre-existing ideological tenets seems troubling. Blind adherence to those principles, no matter how benevolent they may be, could potentially compromise the acquisition of any truth that does not mesh with them precisely.

What's frightening is that it seems like, if many of the commenters had their way, this person would be barred from ever holding a job of any kind. Others upped the ante by expanding the target. The legal profession as a whole was deemed suspect, as entry into law school was evidence of either deficiency in the hard sciences, or poor moral character.

I would humbly suggest only this: That by taking so strident a posture, one seems less open-minded than the very people they're attempting to condemn.

missdelite: "The mere suggestion that it is possible that intelligence - however one might define it in this instance - is not distributed precisely equally among all racial groups does not, in and of itself, constitute racism in my opinion."

It may not constitute racism, but it does constitute lazy thinking.

I'm going to assume that we're referring to book smarts as opposed to street smarts, because the former is measurable by test scores while the latter can't be quantified into a neat, chart-ready statistic.

I define "book smarts" as intellectual training that prepares an individual for employment in a field that requires higher learning. If you want to look at test scores and make a correlation between race and intelligence, you first have to examine who has access to what academic prepatory tools and why certain groups have access in higher numbers than others.

Who goes to the best schools? Who can afford the best tutors? Who gets preferential treatment in classrooms? Who can afford tuition to an Ivy League institution? Whose father fraternizes with high ranking CEOs who can guarantee his recently graduated son/daughter an interview?

Once you've answered these questions, the next logical step is to ask "Why?", which inevitably leads to an examination of Western history.

The fact is, you simply can't draw any conclusions about the relationship between race and intelligence in contemporary society without looking at the history of conquest and subjugation, slavery, privilege (be it earned or robbed) and social exclusion.

This is why I called the suggestion you mentioned above "lazy thinking", because it's just too easy to blame one group's lack of progress on some hypothetical defect they were supposedly born with as opposed to a burden they were saddled with the moment they fell out of the womb. It conveniently ignores social structures that've been in place for hundreds of years and continue to benefit certain groups over others to this very day, in an attempt for that group to justify living off the fruits of other people's labour.

And yes, it's the same lazy thinking that leads to moral and legal judgments that implicate entire swathes of people deemed intellectually inferior. After all, how can one group justify punishing and limiting the personal freedoms of another group if they don't see themselves as intellectually superior? What, exactly, gives a group the right to act as judge and jury over another?

I can only attribute your lazy thinking to a certain comfort level derived from reaping the benefits sowed by past generations. It would do you well to acknowledge the sins and triumphs of your ancestors that afforded you a place of privilege in society. Maybe when you've understood what your family's been through, you'll get a clue as to what other families have not. Just be grateful your family's records have (most likely) survived hundreds of years. Mine - on the other hand - were lost the day my ancestors were either herded onto merchant and slave ships or slaughtered by conquistodors who "discovered" them on their native soil.

Who were my great grandparents? Honey, I don't know. Do you think my family's lack of connection to prosperous institutions over a multitude of generations has impacted my progress as a citizen today? Most definitely "Yes".

Oh, and guess what? My intelligence and genes have nothing to do with it.
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NEW POST
Racial Profiling
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