Here Comes the Bribe

Got these flowers from a client last night.

Pretty, right?

Unfortunately, they're inappropriate considering it was my first time meeting him.

The message they send to me is either that he desperately wants me to like him, or he wants me to give him special treatment.

No can do on both counts unless I've spent some time with him and he turns out to be a cool guy.

You see, the flowers are a bribe. A subtle way to try and buy influence as opposed to earning it.

I hate that.

I wanted to say to him, If you're not a tool, you've got nothing to worry about.

Of course, the kind of guy who does stuff like this usually turn out to be a major d-bag, hence the need (in his mind) to bring flowers. He knows he has a lousy track record with women, so he thinks if he gives me something pretty, maybe I won't notice what other women have picked up on before.

In accordance with this line of thought, I'm supposed to swoon at his feet at the mere site of the precious blossoms, eager to please him. I'm supposed to think: He put so much effort into the gesture! He thinks I'm special even though we've never met! How will I EVER repay him???

Dude must think I was born yesterday.

Another thing that's just occurred to me is: what if he bought the flowers hoping I'd think of him whenever I look at them?


That's too much!

The guy was a fucking lunatic.

He kept giggling and squirming and calling me Gorgeous.

Believe me, the sooner I forget him, the better.

I really don't know why it's so hard for guys to understand that it's their behaviour that makes a lasting impression on a woman, and not the damn gifts.

I really don't know why they underestimate women to the extent that they do.